The early days of a startup, no matter where you are in your personal life, is like the Hunger Games – kill or be killed.
Ten years ago, when we started our professional services firm – we felt pulled in so many directions with growing families, needy extended families, friends who wanted attention, and oh yeah, our business. Alarms were set earlier and earlier each day, whether it was to feed the kids, get ready for a big meeting, or both. And we were up until all hours of the night trying to get out monthly invoices, a pressing client deliverable or the next turn on our strategy document. Victoria swears there is a picture of her breastfeeding her twins using a double boppy, working away on her laptop while the TV blared in the background with Mickey Mouse Club for her older children.
Our Hunger Games was managing a growing family while trying to get a business off the ground. Yours could be the mental strain of being the breadwinner in the family and knowing you have the weight of the world on your shoulders that you can’t f&$k it up. Or, some other version of female hell we haven’t considered yet. Whatever the inputs are, the outcome is going to be the same – and you need a few coping mechanisms to get your through the day. Here are ours:
- Center and reprioritize. Figure out the root of the overwhelm. Victoria usually spins when she is on the defensive, fighting fires and just trying to stay afloat vs. setting goals and marching towards them. Her fix? One hour with her calendar and a cup of coffee (or wine, in a cup) planning out the one hard thing she must complete each day.
- Accept that sometimes 75% is just fine. This is a hard one for the overachievers (ahem pot…kettle…black…), but the reality is sometimes getting to 75% of your todo list for work, for family, for life in any given day or week is just fine. Or, actually an Olympian feat in itself.
- Lean on your Kitchen Cabinet, your best friend, your mom, sister or whoever knows you best. We all have our person when overwhelm has taken over and you find yourself in a closet eating your kid’s leftover Halloween candy…in March. For us, it’s usually each other. We let the other vent, then calmly walk her back to a more rational place and help come up with one thing that will make her feel like she is making progress.
Remember, burnout benefits no one. Give yourself grace and allow time for a personal reset rejuvenation. Sometimes, a few hours of screwing around with your children and hearing their crazy laughter is just the reset you need to be able to attack your to do list one again.
